Ramblings

I sit here thinking about things...mainly just where my life is heading and where it should have been. I like to watch Teen Mom 2 because I want to know what happens to Leah and Corey's twin girls, especially the one who has some problems (which they didn't really find out much during the season). I finally got to catch the season finale and Leah and Corey got married...so naturally, that gets me to thinking about how I should have already gone through all of that. But, of course, I had to get stupid...but that's a completely different story. I know who I want to be with forever and I know that he wants me for forever too...I just don't know why he won't make it official! It just really bothers me and makes me wonder if he said all of that just to get me back or if he really truly meant it. I know deep down that he meant it but we also have to take time to get to know each other again because a lot had gone on in 3 years and that changes people.

I also got to thinking about my future and how uncertain it is. Anyone who knows me knows that I don't like surprises and I don't like change. I also don't want to be stuck in a rut either. I hate knowing that after I graduate with my MBA that nothing will change with work. No promotion, no raise, nothing. I will have the highest degree in the entire company and nothing will change. There won't even be any help in paying for the CPA Exam fees. I'm just really at a crossroads with all of this and at least I have until the end of December to figure it all out. But, knowing my luck, they'll talk me in to staying at least until February or so...so at least another year. I'm ready to start my career. To start my life! When I look back on my time at the company I currently work for I'll see a lot of good times but I'll also see all of the bad that I had gone through, personally, while I was there.

I just wish I had some answers for things and that I didn't feel so lost.